Today sparks the start of round two....thankfully, my oncologist agreed to drop it slightly in the hope that I can manage the side effects better. You have to be able to live at the same time as having treatment, or what's the point?
This first round really took it out of me. I have dropped 5 kilos and the neuropathy has been by far the worst i have experienced in the 4 years of chemotherapy. But the latter part of this week has been really productive and I feel like I have got my fight back. I treated myself to a little shower stool (will post a photo later...my hubby thinks it's hilarious, but you know what? If it means I can shower myself, then I am blooming going to use it). We went to the seafront on my new rented little mobility scooter this weekend. We would, as a family, regularly go for long walks along the seafront, but since the cancer has spread to my lungs twice now and my IVC has collapsed from radiotherapy, walking has been a bit of a problem. Feeling isolated is something that myself and other patients often experience when on chemo, so being able to be with my family and not miss out meant the absolute world this weekend.
Alongside the chemo sickness, I've really suffered this week with my anticipatory sickness, so I reached out to my amazing nurse at the cannabis clinic on Friday and we discussed upping the dose over the next few days in the run up to round two. You know what? Whilst I am still bricking it, the anxiety level this morning is nowhere near what I was expecting it to be. I even slept last night, which genuinely, prior to taking medical cannabis, I would have been awake all night binge watching netflix. Surely that has got to help too? I guess we will find out.....
Whatever you are doing today, smile when you can, laugh with a friend and tell someone you love them.